I started this blog mainly for my own sanity. I spend a lot of time talking to people under 10, so a lot of what I want to say goes unsaid. My own internal monologue involves a lot of swearing, with jokes that would go over the average preschoolers head (I say "average" because I heard a youth on the bus say "That's what she said!" recently. He was not average.)
I digress. Basically, I had nobody to talk to. I would recount my day to the husband, but only after a lot of thought went into which bits would be filtered (he didn't need to know that today his daughter slid pant-less down the stairs singing Row Row Row The Boat after a particularly eventful toilet trip). The point is, nobody really knew what it was like to be me, and that is just the way it was. However, after a few months of bumping into the same few people on the 5-days-a-week school run, small talk turned to general chatter-chatter. General chatter-chatter, which is not the name of a character in a kids TV show, was a welcome break from the usual silence of the school yard. We talked less about "Oh, that was your kid that did that! Yes I read about it in the school newsletter!" And "Ah yes, that was a particularly tricky homework." And more of "How are you?"
And so, against what I initially thought would happen before Dylan started school, I started to make friends. It was through no great social brilliance on my own part, to be honest. It was down to pure luck. Another mum happened to have gone to my old school and been best friends with my sister for a few years, and she knew someone else and we become a trio. We scooped another off the yard because she tittered at our loudly idiotic comments, and became quite the foursome (a word that would have us all giggling like immature kids, even now). We have a few sideliners too, who occasionally make up the group, but all-in-all, we get along quite well.
We suggested a coffee morning one week, just for giggles. That's what mothers do, right? Have coffee and discuss the homework schedule. And that's what we did. For the first few weeks.
By the time Christmas in the kids second year rolled around, we decided to get a cheeky tipple in for the coffee morning. It's Christmas after all, and Jolly Old St Nick wouldn't begrudge us. So a bottle of Prossecco was aquired and we enjoyed it immensely. In fact, we enjoyed it so immensely that Prossecco Mornings completely eclipsed Coffee Mornings, and have ever since. I say "Prossecco", but it should more accurately be called "Sparkling Wine Mornings", because the Prossecco quickly became Cava, which in turn devolved into Lambrini. For those unfamiliar with Lambrini, imagine drinking sugary urine from a boot that was found at the bottom of an old box. You get the picture.
And so, my outlook of "stand silently and collect your child with as little drama as possible" has completely changed. I now get to the school yard with a new (hushed) story to tell or hear, and people to listen along with. We all agree that we practically live for our Friday Mornings, and have promised not to judge each other's abodes. We're all in it together, for the next few years at least, and it's such a relief to have someone along with me for the ride.
As for why I have suddenly decided to update this blog after a massive gulf in content? Well, I may have mentioned to the girls today that I have a blog. We may have been having a Friday Coffee Morning/ Lambrini Afternoon and I may have agreed to post a new page.
I might even come back again soon and tell you how best to get scooped by a Stepford Wife (hint: don't be me!) and why on Sunday's.. We wear capes!
